From Jakarta to Birmingham: Back to school with my kids
Written by Fellin Kinanti
I can’t believe it’s been almost ten months and three changing seasons since we moved from Jakarta to Birmingham.
Hi everyone, I’m Fellin, a mother of two and a postgraduate student at the University of Birmingham’s School of Education. A year ago, I made the decision to pursue a Master’s in Education for Social Justice, a programme not yet available in Indonesia. However, it was one of the toughest decisions I’ve ever made. I was faced with the options of leaving my seven-year-old daughter and five-year-old son or bringing them with me to this new country.
Thankfully, I wasn’t making this journey alone. My husband was also accepted to a postgraduate programme at the University of Birmingham, so we decided to take this leap together as a family. Still, the doubts were there. Could I really juggle postgraduate study and motherhood in a foreign country, adapt to a completely new environment, and return to academic life after ten years away from the classroom? But I reminded myself: nothing good comes without fear!
A moving pack of students
I decided to bring my children after learning that UK primary schools typically run for six hours on weekdays. That meant I would have those hours to study, attend classes, and find a balance between being a full-time student and mother.
Even so, the transition wasn’t smooth. While my son was enrolled in school almost immediately, my daughter had to wait for a place. With no childcare options, she came with me to campus during the Welcoming Week. To my surprise and relief, everyone at the University of Birmingham welcomed us with open arms.
Staff and lecturers not only allowed her to be in the welcoming activities with me, but ever since, also continuously checked in on our well-being, offering any support they could. It made me feel seen, not just as a student, but as a mother doing her best. This sense of support has made all the difference for a student mum. In a place far from home, small acts of kindness from everyone are what we truly need.
Tips for a student mum
Time management is also a big challenge for student mums. 24 hours almost feels like not enough for a day. Balancing assignments, classes, and parenting is a daily challenge, but I’ve learned to be more intentional with my time. I plan my study hours carefully around school runs and family routines, and I’ve become much better at asking for help and being kinder to myself. I try to focus more on progress. I remind myself that being here, doing this, is already an achievement.
In between everything, I also try to make time for the things I love:reading novels and cooking. It’s not always easy, but I do what I can. Sometimes it’s just a few pages before bed, or a quick meal the kids love. It might seem small, but I believe looking after our well-being, even in simple ways, is truly important.
I’m also grateful to be doing this alongside my husband. Having a partner who’s walking a similar academic path helps a lot. We’re both learning to manage time, support each other through deadlines, and take turns with parenting duties. It’s a team effort, and his presence has made this journey feel less lonely.
While navigating all this, there are a few things I’ve learned. It is that fear doesn’t have to stop you, especially when you have a strong support system behind you. From fellow students to lecturers, my husband, and even my kids, I’ve found unexpected sources of strength throughout my journey.
To any mum out there who wants to pursue your studies far away from home and is wondering if you can do it: you can! It won’t be perfect, but with courage, planning, and a little support, it’s more than possible.